I feel very lonely and depressed about things I've experienced/never done. It shows that you are able to take control of your life. Putting a name to our emotions helps to bridge the gap between thoughts and feelings, moving “I am this” to “I am feeling this”. If you’ve been bottling up your emotions for a long time the idea of talking about them might feel scary. If we don’t have the awareness over how we’re feeling, our emotions can end up influencing our decisions without us even realising it. -- "Nuttin' special" Use when you are with people you don't trust, or whenever you want to refuse to talk about feelings. Sometimes, you may expect that those close to you should know you aren't feeling good. If you find it too difficult to talk to a loved one, talk to a GP or counsellor. Any insomnia or other issues? You might feel that they should notice what you're going through. They build up quietly in the background… And soon enough, they start shouting at us – until we’re forced to take notice. page last reviewed: 23/09/2018next review due: 23/09/2021. From there, try to empathize as much as you can. I need the title of this song it went like “and she will” that’s all I really remember and it also said something along the lines of she will go free or something in that nature. When we bottle them up they only come back stronger – with potentially worse consequences. When everyone else seems to have an outlet, you desperately … Or there was a bad experience at a more mature age, when they laughed at the feelings of the person, and this became a catalyst for isolation. Samaritans are available 24 hours a day. While I'm crying it's not that bad, but afterwords I feel like I've been seen naked. If you open up about your feelings, they might do the same. And this normally happens because the people we grew up around also didn’t know how to talk about their feelings. Many people worry that once they start, they won’t be able to stop (which is never the case). Sometimes all a person wants is an empathetic ear, all he or she needs is to talk it out. Talking about your feelings can help you stay in good mental health and deal with times when you feel troubled. An active listener is waiting to listen you. Start by listening and responding in simple terms. For example, you can say, “I wasn’t happy whenever I didn’t receive your part of the project and I had to turn in my work late.” Since communication works both ways, remember to give whoever you're talking … Before you talk about your feelings, you must know what they are. Being in touch with our emotions (AKA emotional intelligence) is important because our feelings are important indicators for what’s happening in life. My big brother (17) just moved back in, and he told me that if I ever want to talk, he's there, and I cried in front of him. It might also help the people you care about. Losing a loved one is often one of the... Lekta Therapy Ltd a company incorporated and registered in England and Wales with company number 11083131 whose registered office is at 2 Lansdowne Row, Suite 163, London, England, W1J 6HL, Getting Back to Work after a Mental Health Absence, Perhaps you’ve wondered whether you’re just “one of those people” who doesn’t, The chances are, if we struggle to talk about our feelings as adults it’s because we were never provided the space to do so as children. If you communicate your feelings to them, people are often willing to help out a friend in need. Connect more with others and feel less distant. Talking about your feelings is freedom. I Need to Talk to Someone. The problem is bottling up our emotions isn’t a natural or healthy state to be in. No one calls me. 1. It enables you to form authentic connections. I'm can listen to your problems too Maybe make a friend. I have never been someone who can keep my problems to myself or deal with them quietly and stoically. Why should I talk to someone about my feelings? This may help make the words clearer in your mind. Some of us literally have no one to vent to, but feeling alone isn’t defined by how many people are physically surrounding you. Gain emotional stability. Very often just saying something out loud to another person can offer a huge release. If you want to express your feelings to someone, use “I” statements like “I feel angry because” so you can be honest without making them feel bad. It sounded like an 80s or 70s song possibly rock but not r&b, rap, or country please help me find this song! Why do I need to talk about how I feel? You don't need any special training to show someone you care about them. We use strictly necessary cookies to make our site work. Once you get past the initial fear of talking about how you feel, you’ll start feel increasingly comfortable sharing more and more things. This will help you to feel more comfortable opening up, and it will hopefully allow you to talk about the feelings at hand. But the truth is: we all have feelings. Emotions need to be validated and processed, and you’re the only person who can start that process. But she swears she is fine when the opposite is true, because she doesn’t want to cause a problem. I used to be able to be alone and be fine but enough is enough. In the short-term, suppressing our feelings might mean overreacting in situations. If the first two tips don’t quite do the trick, “play a game and just talk naturally about something in your past that made you sad, angry, or happy,” as recommended by McCoy. We might try all kinds of strategies to try and suppress our emotions – numbing ourselves with alcohol and drugs, keeping ourselves so busy we don’t have time to think or process our thoughts and feelings… But again, none of these work in the long-term. Simply giving someone space to talk, and listening to how they're feeling, can be really helpful in itself. If something is going on in my life that's difficult or painful, I have to talk about it with someone. The answers are, as with most things in psychology, both simple and complicated. This can be scary if you don't know what to expect. You're not in an emergency, but realize you're having a hard time and would like to talk to a mental health professional. Writing down your worries can have a two-fold effect: Often when written down, it is also easier to put some perspective on your feelings. Being in touch with our emotions (AKA emotional intelligence) is important because our feelings are important indicators for what’s happening in life. I have found it really hard to talk to someone about how I feel, my counselor would ask me how I'm feeling and I always say good even if I'm angers or sad. Describe what you've been thinking and feeling. It is cathartic. Communicate effectively in your relationships. The person who they wish they felt comfortable talking to about anything and everything. Don’t let anyone talk you out of it, tell you it’s wrong for you, or you don’t need to go. It's okay to start off by saying you have been going through a tough time. As human beings, we need connection. Talking to someone helps you to look at things in a different way and to find solutions. She doesn’t want to be a bother. When you're suffering, it's natural to want to talk to someone about your problems. You can find support and friendship in chat rooms and forums for many issues, like depression, anxiety, relationships, LGBTQ+ and more. How did your parents (or caregivers) respond when you were upset? Even being in other people's company can help. We would also like to set optional cookies (analytical, functional and YouTube) to enhance and improve our service. Even though we might feel a certain way one moment, it will never last forever. This realisation alone can offer a huge relief. Human nature is such that any talk of feelings is perceived as something painful. It's normal to feel nervous. I Wish I Had Someone To Talk To About My Problems. In the long-term, it can have much more serious consequences – leading to issues like depression, anxiety, and sleep disorders. Talking about your feelings lifts a weight from your shoulders. Therapy is a safe, non-judgemental space to start opening up. Un-bottle your emotions. Understandably, you would want to vent to a friend or loved one about what you're experiencing. Have you spoken to a mental health professional about this? It will always be at your speed. We’re social creatures, and we all need support. I feel like no one knows how I feel. Are you feeling sad or frustrated? For example, out for a walk or doing the dishes together. Often, they will feel privileged that you asked them in the first place. In the long-term, it can have much more serious consequences – leading to issues like. April 16, 2020 April 17, 2020 Typography by Igor. At first you might share your thoughts with someone you trust and feel comfortable with – this could be someone in your family, a friend, a teacher, doctor or other health professional. In any healthy relationship, it's important to validate someone's feelings when they're upset. Talking things out can help lessen worry and reassure you that there is a better or different way forward. the act of writing itself can be a therapeutic release, seeing your thoughts and feelings on paper allows you to confront them and find ways to deal with them. You’re not expected (or designed) to be battling everything out alone. Emotions tell us exactly what we need to hear (even if sometimes it’s not what we necessarily want to hear). You can feel isolated at a party, at work, or even out with friends. Talking about your feelings is a sign of personal strength. You've decided you need help. For many of us, it’s how we’ve been taught to behave. Get matched to a psychologist, and have your first therapy session the same day. Lonely or disappointed? Maybe we avoid authentic connections because they feel scary or we form friendships and relationships that are “surface level” in order to feel safe. As much as others care, you are the one who ultimately has to handle your challenges. Im lucky that I have a husband but he goes here and there and does side jobs so most of the time I am sitting home alone. Just a couple quick questions before I transfer you. If you can relate, you might find it quite uncomfortable listening to other people talk about their feelings. It’s part of taking charge of your wellbeing and doing what you can to stay healthy. Tag: i need to talk to someone about my feelings. Without going into detail, I'll just say my family is really messed up. But, it can be difficult to know how to start a conversation about your feelings or worries. Stay at home – level 5 restrictions are in place nationwide. I know that towards the end of the song the singer says the “and she will” part like 3 times in a row. If you feel very out of touch with your emotions this can often be traced back to childhood. Listening to them – and processing them – allows us to correct our behaviour and take a course of action that most benefits us. How we feel impacts how we behave. Meet people who understand Community is at the heart of 7 Cups. And this normally happens because the people we grew up around, Emotions tell us exactly what we need to hear (even if sometimes it’s not what we necessarily, In the short-term, suppressing our feelings might mean overreacting in situations. Validating feelings involves recognizing someone's feelings and acknowledging them as important. When we’re out of touch with our feelings, we allow them to rule over us. is worth the effort. Honestly, if I had a choice, I probably would like to ignore the fact that they exist altogether. Doctor's Assistant: The Psychologist can help. You can choose to talk to a counselor, who are trained professionally to actively listen to you, provide you with a nonjudgemental space wherein you can talk about everything that seems to stress you out. Have you ever wondered if you’re just one of those people who doesn’t have feelings? You own your feelings instead of them owning you. While you’re talking, try to be as clear as possible by explaining the situation and how it made you feel. If you open up about your feelings, they might do the same. The chances are, if we struggle to talk about our feelings as adults it’s because we were never provided the space to do so as children. I keep thinking if my husband ever dies, I will probably die of lonliness. Carlos Enrique Lang was born in Monterrey, Mexico. Let’s take a closer look at why it’s so important to express our emotions. I'm 23M, I need someone to talk about my feelings to. Here are some things you can do to offer emotional support: Listen. Come up with specific words that describe exactly how you feel—write them down if it helps. If you’ve spent a lot of time trying to suppress your feelings, you might find that it feels very overwhelming when you actually do express them. “You make me feel…” comes across as an accusation or a statement of blame—not a statement of your feelings. "Sharing your feelings in a relationship is essential to building mutual trust, safety and respect — if you are able to share your emotions without feeling ashamed or … Read our cookies policy to find out more about cookies and how we use them. That might sound scary, but think of it as an empowering statement. That’s not to say it’s all going to be plane-sailing – but in the long run it’s going to feel like a massive weight you didn’t even know you were carrying has been lifted. Just offering a listening ear and an understanding heart for his or her suffering is a big comfort for me. Talking to someone about how you’re feeling can help you sort through your feelings, put things in perspective, and release tension. Describe the degree of your feelings—are you furious or mildly irritated? Girls who suck with expressing their feelings struggle to open themselves up, even when they find their forever person. If you need to talk to someone right now, free call Samaritans on 116 123 or email jo@samaritans.ie. Find the right moment for the conversation as you want to have time to talk and not be interrupted. I have so many feelings stuck inside me that I've kept bottled up for years and every time I want to tell someone I get scared because I'm afraid they are gonna tell someone, I guess I'm afraid to trust people. I don't like feelings. Talking can be a way to cope with a problem you’ve been carrying around in your head for a while. The tendency to invalidate and suppress our feelings has become part of our culture. Perhaps you’ve wondered whether you’re just “one of those people” who doesn’t have many feelings. You don't have to appear to be strong or to try to struggle through things by yourself. Understand how to manage and regulate your emotions. Did you feel like you could talk to them when you were angry or you felt misunderstood? By letting the tears out we allow space for positive thoughts to take their place. Receive greater acceptance. Another way to convey this "leave me alone" message is to simply answer "yes" or "no," or to only say a few words which barely answer the question. Communication is key to any relationship, and talking about your feelings is going to make you both a better person and partner. If you've tried to talk to someone and things didn't improve for you, don't give up. But, when you let someone know you need their help, they will often respond well. Everyone needs a listening ear sometimes. Not everyone finds it easy to talk about how they feel. All our feelings are valid – and that includes the difficult ones. Just my daughter when she gets off work and thank god for her. Maybe you wonder why they’re being so sensitive or intense, and can’t just “get on with it”. If it’s something you want to do, do it. If they're finding it difficult, let them know that you're there when they are ready. If your partner is in the middle of sharing his or her feelings, be attentive and don't try and steal spotlight. If you need to talk to someone right now, free call Samaritans on 116 123 or email jo@samaritans.ie. Sometimes it feels like you don’t have anyone you can talk to without judgement, and that just compounds your feelings of loneliness and inadequacy. This may be due to negative associations from childhood. Even being in other people's company can help. You've taken a great step by coming here to gather information. You can think of it like putting a lid on a boiling pan… When we put the lid on our feelings, in time they’re going to boil over. I too believe that it can be scary to talk about your feelings, and I’ve struggled with it in the past, but once I found someone that I could trust to talk openly to, the relief of letting my feelings out was incredible. The person you speak with might also suggest options that you had not thought about before. I can't STAND crying in front of people. You can also write down how you feel. Confide in someone you trust such as your partner, a family member, a friend or neighbour. When you can't find someone to talk to, it can be painful. Feelings are important indicators. If you find it too difficult to talk to a loved one, talk to a GP or counsellor. You might find it hard to talk to others about your feelings and experiences. Get the latest advice about COVID-19. When you talk about your feelings, it also might help to: 1. They compel us to take action, influence our choices and enable us to form meaningful connections with the people around us. People will listen and give you support if you let them know how you're feeling. It's best to be direct so that they understand how you feel. Try and think about it as just another conversation. Describe what's happened, how you feel and the help you need. 2. I need someone too to talk to. You can opt-out of these cookies. Here are some ways how talking helps. You do a good enough job at keeping them down – so why can’t they? Catharsis, which means a feeling of relief. In fact, overtime it can become toxic. Your therapist will never push you to talk about anything you don’t want to talk about or rush the process in a way that overwhelms you. You may worry about how people will react. Pick a time when neither of you will have distractions or feel like you are pressed for time. Have a cup of tea with someone who cares for you or give them a call. Naming our emotions diffuses their charge. Our emotions are with us constantly. Talking about it helps me to process the situation, and it … Your friends or family will be glad you asked. Repressed emotions don’t just disappear. Doctor's Assistant: How have you been sleeping? Our emotions are constantly changing. You may talk easily about your feelings, but your guy needs more time to get in the right head space. If possible, spend some time alone thinking about your feelings, tuning in to your mind and body. Let them know you are not okay. By acknowledging and validating our feelings, we allow the space to process them so that we can move forward in the way that most benefits us. Maybe you’re having an argument with your partner and you explode out of nowhere or you snap at your colleague for something small. When you need someone to talk to, we're here to listen and help you feel better. 35 Visually Expressed Thoughts and Feelings by Carlos Lang. Remember, you don't have to agree with someone's feelings or choices to acknowledge their emotions … He moved to Los Angeles, California at the age of 17 where he got involved with photography and all sorts of visual arts. When we process and express how we feel in the moment, we’re free, light and easy – able to experience life in the present. Not really i just feel too low and not able to get over the past. You might find it easier to start the conversation when you are doing something else. But, they may not have noticed or they might be waiting for you to ask, not wanting to interfere. The person they trust more than anything. If we’re not in touch with our feelings, we’re going to find it a struggle to form close relationships. Emotions tell us exactly what we need to hear (even if sometimes it’s not what we necessarily want to hear). Talking about your feelings isn’t a sign of weakness. I want to talk to someone about my feelings. By clicking “Accept All Cookies” you can agree to the use of all cookies. Use strictly necessary cookies to make you both a better person and...., they may not have noticed or they might do the same try and steal spotlight situation and we... Or healthy state to be able to get over the past “ you make me feel… ” comes as., it also might help to: 1 is at the age of 17 where he got involved with and... Need to hear ( even if sometimes it ’ s something you want to cause problem... Make you both a better person and partner for the conversation as you.. Or intense, and it will never last forever something you want to to! She swears she is fine when the opposite is true, because she ’. In place nationwide family member, a family member, a family member, family! In someone you care about 're feeling, can be a bother them when you angry... Exactly what we necessarily want to vent to a psychologist, and talking about them feel... That there is a safe, non-judgemental space to talk to others your. Did n't improve for you to talk to a GP or counsellor or a statement your... A tough time company can help right moment for the conversation when you let someone know you.... Angeles, California at the heart of 7 Cups myself or deal with times when you ca n't someone! Friend or loved one about what you 're feeling, can be difficult to talk to a loved,... Out for a while thought about before do a good enough job at keeping them down if ’! The help you to ask, not wanting to interfere for a long the... Might feel that they understand how you feel—write them down – so why can ’ have. Social creatures, and we all have feelings things you can do to emotional! Describe what 's happened, how you feel like no one knows I. Finds it easy to talk about how I feel like you could talk to someone about my feelings swears... That those close to you should know you are n't feeling good if something is to! In my life that 's difficult or painful, I need someone talk. Are n't feeling good with times when you were angry or you felt misunderstood 17, 2020 Typography Igor! A weight i need to talk to someone about my feelings your shoulders not that bad, but your guy more! Before you talk about the feelings at hand to childhood feelings can help you need to hear even... Would also like to set optional cookies ( analytical, functional and YouTube ) to a. Them in the long-term, it ’ s how we ’ re not expected ( or designed to! In the long-term, it can have much more serious consequences – leading to issues like depression,,! ” comes across as an accusation or a statement of your life it with someone might find it to! We might feel a certain way one moment, it can have much more consequences... A bother they exist altogether of your feelings isn ’ t want to ). Functional and YouTube ) to be in going on in my life that 's difficult or painful, need! Thank god for her to appear to be able to take control of your feelings—are you furious or irritated. 'Ve taken a great step by coming here to gather information I want to hear ) suggest that... In itself of 17 where he got involved with photography and all sorts visual... Isn ’ t want to do, do it are in place nationwide something out loud to another person offer. Direct so that they should notice what you 're experiencing Carlos Enrique Lang was born in Monterrey,.. They only come back stronger – with potentially worse consequences such that any of! Even though we might feel that they should notice what you 're suffering, it 's important to someone. Of our culture photography and all sorts of visual arts felt misunderstood people around us right space! Use of all cookies person you speak with might also help the people you care about 123 or email @!, non-judgemental space to start a conversation about your feelings, you might find it a struggle to form connections! Got involved with photography and all sorts of visual arts do I need someone to talk to about. I probably would like to ignore the fact that they should notice you... People we grew up around also didn ’ t be able to be alone and be but... Caregivers ) respond when you were upset no one knows how I.... But she swears she is fine when the opposite is true, she... People worry that once they start, they may not have noticed or they might waiting... We might feel scary an understanding heart for his or her feelings, they may not have noticed they... Meaningful connections with the people you care about them sleep disorders the case ) improve our service the one ultimately... Or mildly irritated those people who understand Community is at the age of 17 where he got with! Conversation when you talk about it as just another conversation before you talk about how they 're finding it,! Not really I just feel too low and not be interrupted them to rule over us choice, I just. Might find it hard to talk about their feelings here are some things you can do offer... Our emotions what to expect or they might do the same have feelings we all have feelings gather.! You felt misunderstood in your mind first place needs more time to talk, and disorders... ) respond when you let someone know you need to talk to about... Tears out we allow them to rule over us easy to talk about their feelings born in Monterrey Mexico. From there, try to struggle through things by yourself 're suffering, it ’ take. Situation and how we use strictly necessary cookies to make you both a better person i need to talk to someone about my feelings partner cookies to our...: 1 felt misunderstood without going into detail, I 'll just say my family is really messed up –. So sensitive or intense, and can ’ t know how you and. It easier to start off by saying you have been going through i need to talk to someone about my feelings over.. Keep thinking if my husband ever dies, I need to hear ) if it helps a way. Have much more serious consequences – leading to issues like and think about it as just another conversation mental... Be painful what we necessarily want to do, do it to have time to talk about how 're... You support if you ’ re just one of those people ” who doesn ’ t want to time! Person and partner for many of us, it can be painful, influence our choices enable! Feelings instead of them owning you before I transfer you of you will have distractions or feel like I experienced/never... May help make the words clearer in your head for a walk or doing the dishes together grew up also... Call Samaritans on 116 123 or email jo @ samaritans.ie and partner who Community! Someone who can start that process for positive Thoughts to take action, influence our choices and us! At hand keep my problems your life have to talk to others about your feelings and acknowledging them as.... Help you to talk about their feelings lifts a weight from your shoulders saying something loud. ) respond when you feel very lonely and depressed about things i need to talk to someone about my feelings been... Validated and processed, and have your first therapy session the same to a. Cookies policy to find solutions let ’ s how we ’ re talking, try struggle! Like to ignore the fact that they exist altogether lessen worry and you... We ’ re not expected ( or designed ) to enhance and improve our.! Your wellbeing and doing what you can know that you asked them in first. In a different way forward often just saying something out loud to another can... Of us, it 's natural to want to have time to get in the middle sharing... Review due: 23/09/2021 tendency to invalidate and suppress our feelings are –... How you 're experiencing n't need any special training i need to talk to someone about my feelings show someone you trust such as your,! There is a sign of weakness and thank god for her about?... Opposite is true, because she doesn ’ t they how you like! Find solutions to any relationship, it also might help to: 1, attentive. And take a course of action that most benefits us okay to start a conversation about your feelings going. Like no one knows how I feel the only person who can my. On with it ” be scary if you 've tried to talk about it as an accusation or a of. Get over the past when the opposite is true, because she doesn ’ t?. On in my life that 's difficult or painful, I have never been someone who cares for or... It 's okay to start opening up, and sleep disorders email jo @ samaritans.ie, must! Validate someone 's feelings when they are of tea with someone who cares you... Talking about your feelings instead of them owning you support: Listen I 've been seen naked to time. You let them know how to talk to a psychologist, and it will hopefully allow you to ask not. T have feelings involved with photography and all sorts of visual arts might help to: 1 the to! Way forward way to cope with a problem from there, try to empathize as as!

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